Walk This Way

It was only the second time we had breakfast at the small “cafeteria” below our hostel and the lady who worked there was already warming up to us. My Spanish isn’t as refined as my Italian and I consistently make mistakes using the latter as a crutch. Notwithstanding my inadequacy, the woman acted like she understood me completely. This nicety was not lost on me.

While Madrid wasn’t the most beautiful city I have seen, it reminded me of something that I forget every time I leave Europe – proximity increases intimacy. Because many of the countries are smaller than my home state of California, the people there have had to be incredibly resourceful with their use of space. Instead of building out, they build up. When they’ve exceeded the limit of traffic on the surface, they go underground. They drive smaller more compact cars or scooters. Instead of driving long distances they take the train. And instead of driving short distances they take public transportation or walk.

When I lived in Italy I sat by my neighbors on the metro everyday and walked by them when I shopped in open markets. There was a sense of community and familiarity. So many people crammed into such a small area forces human interaction. What many think would create friction instead created harmony.

In the States we have a lot more space. While this luxury provides for large lots of land, mcmansions and ample separation between neighbors, it also creates a humanity that is detached. For the religious, one of the greatest laws is to love thy neighbor. This becomes more difficult if you don’t know your neighbor and never actually meet them. Most of us awake, eat breakfast and slip into our garage undetected. We open the door to our car and shut ourselves in. We open our garage and roll down the road toward our daily routine. Despite a couple of breaks in the process, it’s almost a completely contained passage. In this same sequence, Europeans have come into contact with dozens of people already. The increased frequency with which they see and actually talk to one another increases their closeness and solidarity. The more you have to interact with humans the more skilled you become at human interaction. Like ants bumping into each other along their trail it seems as if they are distracted and not focused. Instead, the daily reinforcement of community makes their sum larger than their parts.

The next time someone new moves into the neighborhood make sure they receive a warm welcome. Instead of getting in the car to do errands, try walking. You might just reconnect with some people you know along the way.  Walking is also a great way to clear your mind and be alone with your thoughts. The walk will come with some sacrifice though – you won’t get nearly as much accomplished. But who cares about accomplishment really? Americans take the least vacations of any people in the world. To make things worse, a study just came out that says more Americans are now working weekends as well.

I ran a successful photography studio for more than a decade in a town of half a million people. I worked seven days a week for many years arriving early and leaving late. I missed many family functions, birthdays and baptisms. If it wasn’t for an illness that forced me to leave my studio and move out of the area where I’d spent years developing a reputation, I would have never left. It was a blessing I initially viewed as a curse.

It will take some time before I can relax and enjoy the natural pace of the people here in Europe. I’m trying to slow down my stride and have to keep reminding myself that I’m in no hurry to go anywhere. I am using the same transportation that my neighbors use. And while my feet are sore, with every step I’m becoming closer and closer to the people around me.